Father’s Day

Fathers Day

Yesterday was Fathers Day. I had planned to give my father a present， so I went to a  store after lunch. I looked around the store and finally choose① a razor for him. After school， I ran back home and started my computer. I made a beautiful card and e-mailed him on the internet. Then I began to make supper with the help of my mother. When my father came home， he was very glad to look for② a big meal and a gift on the table. I asked him to check his e-mail. He was amazing③ to find a beautiful card in his e-mail-box. “What a wonderful surprise！” My father said.

江苏省连云港市赣榆区罗阳中学八（2）班  王婷

1. 优点：

本文是一篇描述父亲节的记叙文。小作者按照时间顺序，记录自己给父亲买礼物、设计贺卡和做晚饭的过程。文章最后用到了“amazed”描述了父亲当时的感受。整篇文章文字流畅、用词得当，是一篇不错的学生习作。

2. 需要修改的地方：

① choose改为chose。前后时态保持一致，此处应该使用一般过去时;

② look for改为find。look for强调“寻找”的动作，find强调“寻找”的结果;

③ amazing改为amazed。amazing用于描述物，意思是“令人惊讶的”;amazed用于描述人，意思是“感到惊讶的”。

3. 评分：

按江苏省连云港市中考英语作文满分25分的评分标准，本文修改前可得23分。