潘海林
读后续写大部分都是围绕conflict和solution来运转的,首先力争读懂原文,找出记叙文的几要素,找到故事情节中到底有什么冲突或问题。然后读懂需要续写的两段的首句,根据首句推测故事发展的走向和两段的大致内容。
续写中,需了解解决问题类的常见模式:
(1)面对问题:消极或积极情绪
(2)心想:心理描写
(3)措施:动作描写
(4)失望:问题没解决或出现了新问题
(5)心里描写:消极情绪
(6)突然有了一个想法
(7)解决办法
(8)转机:似乎有了转机,抱有希望,感到欣慰
(9)结局:问题解决,积极情绪
(10)总结:点题,呼应前文
需要说明的是,并非每个环节都需要,也可能不是这个顺序,甚至可以穿插进行,这不是死板的,要灵活把握。
下面,我们按照上述常见模式,依次列出一些写作中可能用到的常用表达。
一、面对问题:产生的消极或积极情绪
典型表达:感到一阵……
feel a flush of...
= feel a wave of...
= feel a feeling/sense of...
注:上述短语后可接joy(高兴), excitement(兴奋), pride(骄傲), anger(愤怒), rage(狂怒), panic(惊慌), alarm(惊慌), terror(恐惧), horror(恐惧), fear(恐惧), unease (不安), sorrow(悲伤), sadness(悲伤), grief(悲伤), embarrassment(尴尬), disappointment(失望), shame(羞愧), guilt(愧疚)等这类情感类名词。如:
He felt a flush of excitement. 他感到一阵兴奋。
She felt a wave of panic, but forced herself to leave the room calmly. 她感到一阵惊慌,但是强迫自己镇静地离开了房间。
上述a sense of relief之类的短语与flooded over sb或swept over sb连用,表示“某人感到一阵……”。如:
A great sense of relief flooded over him. 他深感宽慰。
A wave of fear swept over him. 他感到一阵恐惧。
如果要表示“一阵复杂的感情”,可以说 a mixture of A and B。如:
a mixture of excitement and nervousness又興奋又紧张
[即时练习]
请根据汉语意思,用上述短语完成英文句子。
(1)看到一把斧子破门而入,她感到一种巨大的恐惧感在内心升腾、奔涌。
Seeing an ax piercing through the door, she felt _________in her heart and surging through her.
(2)感到一种巨大的嫉妒感在内心升腾、奔涌,她朝那个女人扔了一个罐子。
Feeling____________ in her heart and surging through her, she threw a can at the woman.
参考答案
(1)a wave of fear flooded
(2)a wave of envy flooded
二、心想:心理描写
1. 心里想
心里想think /say to oneself
内心的声音告诉某人……
An inner voice told sb that...
2. 害怕;恐慌
害怕地,吓得with fear /panic /terror
颤抖:tremble; shiver; shake; quake
害怕得颤抖tremble with fear
吓得要死seem dead with fear
惊慌失措be seized with panic
恐慌尖叫scream with panic
吓呆了freeze with terror
惊恐地叫道scream with terror
害怕得发抖 shake with terror
3. 生气;愤怒
愤怒地,气得with rage
因盛怒而满脸通红be red-cheeked with rage
气得发抖tremble /shake with rage
气得想哭feel like crying with rage
气得说不出话来 be speechless with rage
气得脸色发紫 become purple with rage
怒火中烧 be boiling with rage
4. 兴奋;激动
兴奋地with excitement
兴奋得喊叫起来yell with excitement
激动得满脸通红flush with excitement
兴奋得跳来跳去jump up and down with excitement
激动地跺着脚 stamp ones foot with excitement
兴奋地喊叫着scream with excitement
激动得心脏怦怦直跳pound with excitement
欣喜若狂go wild with excitement
5. 悲伤;流泪
(1)Tears blurred ones eyes. 泪水模糊了她的双眼。
(2)Ones eyes got misty. 一个人的眼睛都模糊了。
(3)Ones eyes misted /dimmed with tears.泪眼模糊。
(4)...be close to tears几乎要哭了
(5)tears roll down ones eyes /cheeks /face泪水落下
三、措施:动作描写
1. 常用词语
张开嘴open ones mouth
睁大眼睛widen ones eyes
站起来rise to ones feet
跳起来jump to ones feet
放声大叫 shout at the top of ones lung
伸出手reach out
抓住我的双手 grasp both my hands
抓住我的胳膊 seize my arm
2. 常用句式
句型一:A, B and C
She hailed a taxi, got into it and told the driver her destination. 她叫了一輛出租车,上了车,告诉司机她的目的地。
He pulled out the meat, aimed at the wolf and threw it straight to the fierce animal. 他掏出肉,瞄准狼,直接扔向那凶猛的动物。
句型二:主干+非谓语
The tourists are sitting in a café,drinking hot coffee. 游客们坐在咖啡厅里,喝着热咖啡。
句型三:非谓语+主干+非谓语
Having fought in the war for years, the soldier returned to his home, only to find his wife had gone with someone else. 打了很多年仗后,这名士兵回到了他的家,结果发现他的妻子和别人跑了。
句型四:非谓语+主干+从句
Having passed the exam, he was so happy that he was at a loss what to do. 通过考试后,他非常高兴,不知所措。
句型五:主干+with+宾语+宾补
She opened the gift with her hands shaking slightly. 她用轻微颤抖的手打开了礼物。
[即时练习]
请根据汉语意思,用上述短语完成英文句子。
1. 站在空旷的道路旁(肢体),他们抬头仰望天空(面部),从内心感受着这珍贵的平静(内心)。
___________ beside the empty road, they ___________ up into the sky, ___________ the precious peace from within.
2. 在老师的话的鼓励下,她举起手,低声说:“我来”。
_______________ by the teachers words, she her hand, __________________,“I volunteer”.
3. 他欣喜若狂,在雨中又唱又跳。
He was wild with joy, _______________and _____________ in the rain.
4. 我別无选择,只能举起课本,希望把自己隐藏起来。
________________ no choice, I slowly raised the book, ___ ____________ to hide myself.
5. 当我讲故事时,她会把头枕在我的胳膊上,眼睛盯着我。
She would lay her head between my arms, ____________ _______ as I told her stories.
6. 她坐在那儿,眼睛盯着电视屏幕。(with的复合结构)
She was sitting there, _____________________.
7. 听到呼喊,邻居们冲了出来,想知道发生了什么。
_______________, the neighbors rushed out, __________ what had happened
8. 毫不犹豫,他收拾好野营装备直奔树林。
____________ any hesitation, he ____________ his camping gear, _____________ straight to the woods.
参考答案
1. standing, looked, enjoying
2. Encouraged, raised, whispering
3. singing, dancing
4. Having, hoping
5. staring at me
6. with her eyes fixed on the TV screen
7. Hearing the cry, wondering
8. Without, put away, running
四、失望:问题未解决或出现了新问题
1. 不幸的是(unfortunately)
(1)But bad luck for sb, ... 但是某人真不走运
(2)She tried her best, but in vain. 她尽力了,但没有成功。
2. 某人做了某事,不知道下一步该做什么。
(1)Sb did sth, wondering what to do next.
(2)Sb did sth, not knowing what to do next.
五、心理描写:消极情绪
Disappointment flooded over sb某人大失所望
六、突然有了一個想法
某人突然想到……
It suddenly occurred to sb that...
=It hit sb that...
=It struck sb that...
=It dawned on sb that...
七、解决办法
1. 鼓起勇气(做某事)
take /gather /ones courage(to do sth)
2. 毫不犹豫/选择
(1)without a second thought
(2)without delay
(3)without hesitation
(4)having no choice
八、转机:似乎有了转机,抱有希望,感到欣慰
1. 似乎,好像
It seemed as if / that...
2. 有了结果
(1)To ones surprise /delight, it turned out that... 令某人惊奇/高兴的是,结果……
(2)Strangely enough, it turned out that... 说来也奇怪,结果……
(3)But on second thoughts, ... 但是转而一想,……
(4)But what happened next was pure magic. 接下来发生的非常奇妙。
3. 欣慰
(1)breathe a sigh of relief 松了一口气
(2) (A wave of)relief flooded through /washed over sb某人如释重负
(3)Collapsing onto the ground with relief, they were still shaking with fear after a narrow escape. 他们如释重负地倒在地上,侥幸逃脱后还在恐惧地发抖。
九、结局:问题解决,积极情绪
1. 不久以后;过了一段时间
(1)not long after that, ... 在那之后不久,……
(2)shortly afterwards, ... 不久以后,……
(3)before long, ... 不久以后,……
(4)It didnt take long before... 没过多久,……
(5)It took some time before, ... 过了一段时间,……
2. 一瞬间/一会儿
for an instant /moment
十、总结:点题,呼应前文
1. 典型表达:直到……才意识到……
(1)倒装句:Not until... did sb realize /notice that...
(2)强调句:It was only... that sb realized that...
2. 经历与教训
(1) What a valuable lesson I have learned from...!我从……中得到了宝贵的教训。
能替代上述句中valuable的还有useful(有益的), great(重要的), painful(惨痛的)等。
(2)What an unforgettable experience!多么难忘的经历啊!
能替代上述句中unforgettable 的形容词还有enjoyable(令人愉快的), pleasant(令人愉快的), wonderful(美好的), memorable(難忘的), interesting(有趣的)等。
3. 结尾点题
(1)天助自助者。
God helps those who help themselves.
(2)每个人都是自己命运的建筑师。
Everyone is the architect of his own fate.
(3)苦难是磨炼人的好机会。
Suffering is a good opportunity to cultivate people.
(4)事实上,每个人都有天赋。发现它的时候要勇敢,也要付出努力。最终,你会创造奇迹。
In fact, everyone has talent. Be brave when you find it and work hard. In the end, youll create miracles.
(5)战胜恐惧和实现目标需要决心和乐观。
Fighting fear and achieving goals require determination and optimism.
(6)生命就是充满欢笑和泪水的。只有同时接受两者,我们才能享受生活。
Life is full of laughter and tears. Only by accepting both can we enjoy life.
(7)有时候一些小小的善行也能带来巨大的改变
Sometimes a little kindness can make a big difference.
(8)有时候,一些小小的关爱也能融化人们内心的孤单。
Sometimes a little love can also melt peoples inner loneliness.
(9)一个小小的善行,无论是对施予者还是接受者,都是一份祝福。
A little good deed is a blessing to both the giver and the receiver.
(10)永远不要低估你的行为的力量。
Never underestimate the power of your action.
责任编辑 蒋小青