这是你的葬礼

高山

我们说，这是你的葬礼，

但实际上不是。

葬礼是为活人举办的。

詹妮和她的兄弟姐妹

将父亲的骨灰装在猎枪子弹里

射向落基山庄西边的

茫茫荒野。

尼杰尔和他的姐妹

请船员帮他们找一把扫帚，

把他们母亲的骨灰

从温哥华与维多利亚轮渡的甲板上扫起，

因为刚才撒骨灰时风向突变。

没有人问骨灰。

骨灰的所思所想再也不重要了。

在你的葬礼上，

我们将围成一圈，说

这个老家伙就这样走了，真是不走运啊。

你说你会脚先出来

很可能会——

你又开始注意家里的摆设，

但现在你关注的是渐次腐烂的屋顶，

不断下沉的台阶，

失效的保险单，

磨毛的绿色地毯。

这些是你死了也要留着的东西。

绕在你四周的房子和你一起下沉。

每次我们去看你，

你都会排练一下你的葬礼安排。

你和我们说过

你希望的安葬地和安葬方式。

现在，告诉我们其中的原因吧。

Its Your Funeral

Its your funeral， we say，

but its not.

Funerals are for the living.

Jannie and her brothers and sisters

packed their fathers ashes in shotgun shells

and fired them into the wilderness

west of Rocky Mountain House.

Nigel and his sisters

asked the crew for a broom

to sweep their mothers ashes

from the deck of the Vancouver-Victoria ferry

when the wind shifted while scattering.

No one asked the ashes.

What they wanted no longer signified.

At your funeral，

well stand around and say

Too bad the old guy let it slip away.

You say youll go out feet first，

and probably will—

House-proud again，

but now of rotting shingles，

sagging steps，

lapsed insurance

green shag carpet.

These things youre dying to keep.

The house sags around and with you.

Each time we visit

you rehearse your funeral plans.

Youve told us how and where

you want to be buried.

Now tell us why.endprint