《文言英译教程》引用译文中的误译初探——兼向郭著章教授请教

贺龙平,张蕾蕾

(1.长沙师范高等专科学校外语系,湖南长沙 410100;2.河南农业大学华豫学院外国语学院,河南商丘 476113)

《文言英译教程》引用译文中的误译初探
——兼向郭著章教授请教

贺龙平1,张蕾蕾2

(1.长沙师范高等专科学校外语系,湖南长沙 410100;2.河南农业大学华豫学院外国语学院,河南商丘 476113)

郭著章教授编著的《文言英译教程》是一部水平很高的翻译教材,但是编者所引用的译文有些值得商榷,主要体现在措辞,句子和篇章三个方面。作为翻译专业本科生的教材,编者有必要在引用时对误译做出说明,以方便学生学习。

《文言英译教程》;措辞;句子;篇章

2006年初,国家教育部颁布了《关于公布2005年度教育部备案或批准设置的高等学校本科专业结果的通知》,正式设立“翻译”专业。2006年复旦大学、广东外语外贸大学和河北师范大学开始招收“翻译专业”本科生,2007年、2008年教育部又先后批准了10所院校设置翻译专业;2007年国务院学位办批准了15所院校设立翻译专业硕士点 (Master of Translation and Interp retation,简称M TI)。这些无疑都是翻译界的大事,其重要性在此无需赘言。为了配合翻译专业的建设,上海外语教育出版社邀请了30余名专家教授,组成了“翻译专业本科生系列教材编委会”。经过几年的辛勤付出,“翻译专业本科生系列教材”先后出版。本套教材的编写队伍和水平代表了我国当前翻译教学和研究的发展方向和水平。但是,仔细阅读郭著章教授编著的《文言英译教程》,会发现其中有一些不尽如人意之处,不是郭教授的翻译有误,而是郭教授所引用的译文有些地方欠妥。有一些误译郭教授指了出来,并做了分析评论,让人受益匪浅,还有一些地方,郭教授却没有指出来。因为千千万万莘莘学子将使用这本书作为教材,有一些佳作学生可能还会背诵。其中的误译,他们不一定能够发现,他们的老师有可能忽略,下面笔者从措辞,句子和篇章三个方面来分析书中引用的一些译文,并请郭教授指正。

1 措 辞

措辞、句子和篇章是一个译者要考虑的三个不同层面。措辞的学习是无穷无尽的,而且还有一个选优的问题,“春风又绿江南岸”,“红杏枝头春意闹”,“鸟宿池边树,僧敲月下门”,这些都是古人炼字的佳话,英语也是如此。因此,书中所列译文的失误主要体现在措辞上。

先列举两个低级错误,可能是排版时出现失误:

1 The monk may run away,but the temp le cannot run away w ith them.[1]P38

2 “虎毒不食儿。”[1]P163Even a vicious tiger doesn’t eat herow n cubs.

上面两个例子代词出现失误,例1中 monk应对应him,monks对应them;例2中tiger应对应 his,或者tigress对应her,所以应改为:

1a Themonks may run away,but the temp le cannot run away w ith them.

2a Even a vicious tiger doesn’t eat hisow n cubs.

因为书中引用的典籍译文多出自现代汉学家之手,他们的思维受到现代工业的影响,没有考虑到现代有的一些东西古代没有,所以出现误译:

3 子曰:“工欲善其事,必先利其器。”[1]P79

The Master said,“The mechanic,w ho wishes to do his work well,must first sharpen his tools.”

4 孔明索纸笔,屏退左右,密书十六字曰:欲破曹公,宜用火攻;万事俱备,只欠东风。[1]P88

Taking penand paper and waving away the attendants,he w rote:To break Cao’s back,we need fire to attack.The w hole scene is set,only the east w ind we lack!

例3中的“工”应当指的是“工匠 (craftsman)”,而不是“技工,机修工 (mechanic)”,孔子那个时代应该是“工匠”更普遍一些;例4中的笔应当指的是“毛笔 (w riting brush)”,而不是“钢笔 (pen)”,所以应改为:

3a The M aster said,“A craftsman,w ho w ishes to do his work well,must first sharpen his tools.”

4a Taking a w riting brushand paper and waving away the attendants,he w rote:To break Cao’s back,we need fire to attack.The w hole scene is set,only the east w ind we lack!

代词和介词在英语中使用广泛,稍微不注意,就会出现误译。尤其是介词,基本上每一个介词都有至少一个迷惑性很强的错误选项。因为代词和介词属于虚词,一般译者在翻译过程中不大注意,而把精力集中于实词。书中名家都有失误之处,更不用说初学者:

5 赵王与大将军廉颇诸大臣谋:欲与秦,秦城恐不可得,徒见欺;欲勿予,即患秦兵之来。 (司马迁《史记·管晏列传》)[1]P26

The king took counselw ith General Lian Po and his chief ministers,w hofeared that if the jade were sent to Qin they might be cheated and get no cities in return,yet if they refused the soldiers of Qin might attack.杨宪益,戴乃迭译

6 先帝不以臣卑鄙,猥自枉屈,三顾臣于草庐之中,咨臣以当世之事。(诸葛亮《出师表》)[1]P86

Your father,the late empero r,unmindful of my low estate,did not consider it beneath his dignity to come to my cottage three times and consult me in matters of policy.

例5译文中w ho指代不清,一般理解为指大将军廉颇及诸大臣 (General Lian Po and his chief ministers),也可以指赵王 (the king),但是综合上下文,应当是指赵王,廉颇及诸大臣。赵王指赵惠文王,史上的一位明君。《史记·管晏列传》让一批贤臣良将名留青史,读者容易忽略着墨不多的君王,但是能够重用贤臣良将的岂是昏君?不是明君能够重用贤臣良将?即是明君,不可能看不透秦国的这点小伎俩。所以,译文指代有误。例6中consult的句型为consult sb(about sth);consult(with)sb(about/on sth)。所以应改为:

5a The king took counsel w ith General Lian Po and his chief ministers.They feared that if the jade were sent to Qin they might be cheated and get no cities in return,yet if they refused the soldiers of Qin might attack.

6a Your father,the late emperor,unmindful of my low estate,did not consider it beneath his dignity to come to my cottage three times and consult me about mattersof policy.

20世纪70年代,描述翻译学兴起,翻译出现文化转向,翻译单位由词变为句子,再扩大到篇章,甚至是两种文化。文化词在典籍中比比皆是,不熟悉两种文化,翻译肯定是举步维艰,误译司空见惯。

7 浩浩乎如冯虚御风而不知其所止,飘飘乎如遗世独立羽化而登仙。[1]P109

We let our boat drift over the vast expanse of water,feeling as free as if we were riding the wind and going to some unknow n destination,as light and carefree as if we had left the wo rld of man and become w inged immortals.

8 挟飞仙以遨游,抱明月而长终。[1]P41

I longed to clasp winged fairiesand roam freely,or to embrace the brightmoon fo r all eternity.

此处出现误译,是因为没有考虑到东西方文化不同。例7中的“羽化”在现代汉语词典中有两种意思:1 是指成仙;2 是指道教徒婉指人死。无论何种解释,翻译成winged都是不对的。中国的佛教强调转世,道教强调永生,所以immo rtals是对的。但是,无论转世还是永生,中国的神仙都是没有翅膀的。《封神榜》中只有雷震子和辛环生有一对翅膀,而且是一对肉翅,不是像鸟那样的羽翅。西方信基督教,西方的天使多有一对白色的羽翅。译文可视为归化,但是容易引起读者对于东方文化的误读。所以更改如下可能好一点:

7a We let our boat drift over the vast expanse of water,feeling as free as if we were riding the w ind and going to some unknow n destination,as light and carefree as if we had left the wo rld of man and become immo rtals.

8b I longed to clasp flying immo rtalsand roam freely,o r to embrace the brightmoon fo r all eternity.

增译和减译是常见的翻译方法,其原则是“增词不增义,减词不减义”。书中有几个地方没有遵循这一原则。

9 千呼万唤始出来,犹抱琵琶半遮面。(白居易《琵琶行》)[1]P50

Being called time and again,the player at last came out;w ith pi-pa in arm and face half hidden,she looked about.曾炳衡

10 肴核即尽,杯盘狼藉。[1]P141

When we had finished the dishes,and cups and p lates lay about us in disorder.

对于例9,郭教授有一段评论:“白居易用“千呼万唤始出来”这个夸张语,揭示了“邀相见者”与被邀者各自的心情。相比较而言,译文2用直译更能体现两者的心情。”这一段评论是中肯的。其实,曾炳衡先生的译文出现了增译:she looked about。该增译有蛇足之嫌,与我国古代的女性形象不符。我国古代的女性是“足不出户”,“笑不露齿,行不露趾”的深闺女性。再怎么开放,也不会第一次见面就抱着琵琶游目四顾 (looked about)。例10中的“肴核”指食物和水果,译文漏译了“核”,所以应改为:

9a Only after a thousand entreaties does she appear,her face half hidden behind the pi-pa in her arms.

10a W hen we had finished the dishes and fruits,and cups and p lates lay about us in diso rder.

理解原文是翻译的前提和基础。如果原文理解有误,译文肯定不对。典籍对于本国人来说,理解都很困难,更不用说对于外国人。其实上面的误译,都可以归结为理解错误。所以,学习英语,不能忘记平时加强汉语的学习。

11 正是俗话说得好:“清官难断家务事,”此时正是“公婆难断床帏事了。”《红楼梦·第八十回》[1]P69

Just as“Not even good officials can settle family troubles”,so“Not even parents can settle disputes between son and w ife.”

12 居庙堂之高,则忧其民;处江湖之远,则忧其君。[1]P101

When such peop le are high in the government or at court,their first concern is fo rthe o rdinary peop le;w hen they retire to distant areas of streams and lakes,their first concern is fo r the sovereign.

13 所赖君子安贫,达人知命。[1]P101

Nevertheless,the virtuousman is content w ith his due poverty,and theman of great understanding know s his destiny.

14 越明年,政通人和,百废俱兴。[1]P108

After Teng Zijing had governed the district fo r a year,the administration went smoothly,the peop le became united and happy,and all things that had fallen into disrepair were under a new construction.

15 出家人行善,如春园之草,不见其长,日有所增;行恶之人,如磨刀之石,不见其损,日有所亏。[1]P163

If amonk acts rightly he w ill grow daily but invisibly,like grass in a garden during the sp ring,w hereas an evildoerw ill be impercep tibly worn away day by day like a w hetstone.

例11中“床帏事 (disputes between son and w ife)”的英译有两种理解,一种是“disputes between son and his w ife”,这一种是正确的;另一种是“disputes between son and hismother”。如翻译如下则没有任何歧义:

11a Just as“Not even good officials can settle family troubles”,so“Not even parents can settle disputes between son and daughter-in-law.”

例12中的“处江湖之远”是指被贬官到了一个离皇帝和朝廷很远的地方,而不是做官退休 (retire)。所以应改为:

12a When such peop le are high in the government or at court,their first concern goes tothe ordinary peop le;w hen they are demoted and banished to distant areas of stream s and lakes,their first concern goes to the sovereign.

例13中的“达人”应当指“心胸豁达的人”,所以应改为:

13a Nevertheless,a virtuousman is content with his due poverty,and a broad-minded man know s his destiny.

例14中的“百废俱兴”是指“各种该办未办的事业都兴办起来”,而不是“年久失修的建筑物被翻新 (all things that had fallen into disrepair were under a new construction)”,所以应改为:

14a After Teng Zijing had governed the district fo r a year,the administration went smoothly,the peop le became united and happy,and all that was left undone is now being done.

例15中的“不见其长”,不是指人长高长个头 (he will grow daily),而是指个人的修为,功德等。所以应改为:

15a If a monk acts rightly his personal accomplishmentswill grow daily but invisibly,like grass in a garden during the sp ring,whereasan evildoer’swill be imperceptibly worn away day by day like a whetstone.

2 句 子

句子翻译主要涉及语法。和措辞不一样,语法原则毕竟是有限的,所以,书中所引用的译文,句法层面上的误译比较少,但是,“智者千虑,必有一失”,有几处误译还是能够被找出来的:

16 那位学贯中西的我国学者和英文大师,年轻时赴美负笈哈佛一年,即得硕士。[1]P15

That Chinese scholar w ho know s China and the West quite well and a master of English went to the U-nited States w hen he was young,and studied there at Harvard University for only one year before he got his Master’s degree.

17 立百福之基,只在一念慈祥;开万善之门,无如寸心挹损。[1]P34

To lay the foundation fo r a hundred blessings one needs only to have an idea of mercy and kindness;to open the gate to ten thousand good deeds,nothing is better than restraining one’s selfish heart.

18 道得众,则得国;失众,则失国。是故君子,先慎乎德,有德,此有人,有人此有土,有土此有财,有财此有用,德者,本也,财者,末也。[1]P80

This show s that,by gaining the peop le,the kingdom is gained,and by losing the peop le,the kingdom is lost.On this account,the ruler w ill first take pains about hisow n virtue.Possessing virtue w ill give him the peop le.Possessing the peop le w ill give him the territory.Possessing the territory will give him its wealth.Possessing the wealth,he w ill have resources for expenditure.Virtue is the roo t;wealth is the result.

例16中的“amaster of English”有歧义,既可以理解为“that Chinese scholar”的同位语,又可以理解为“know s”的宾语,稍微改一下即可消除歧义:

16a That Chinese scholar,a master of English w ho know s China and the West quite well ,went to the United States w hen he was young,and studied there atHarvard University fo r only one year before he got his Master’s degree.

例17中的“to open the gate to ten thousand good deeds,nothing is better than restraining one’s selfish heart”存在主语不一致的现象,即应该是某人来“开万善之门 (to open the gate to ten thousand good deeds)”,而不是“nothing”,前面的译文是正确的,所以应改为:

17a To lay the foundation fo r a hundred blessings one needs only to have an idea of mercy and kindness;to open the gate to ten thousand good deeds,one should restrainone’s selfish heart.

例18有两个问题:第一是“by gaining the peop le,the kingdom is gained,and by losing the peop le,the kingdom is lost”存在主语不一致之嫌,即应该是某人,比如说皇帝,赢得或者失去民心,而不是王国 (kingdom),王国 (kingdom)是无生命的,怎么赢得或者失去民心?第二,“by losing the peop le,the kingdom is lost”这个句子有点怪。读起来好像是某人特地失去民心,进而失去自己的王国。没有人会这么做。历史上的昏君都声称自己爱民如子,执法如山,鞠躬尽瘁,死而后已,都骂造反的人是乱臣贼子,正义永远在昏君这一边,昏君是永远不会承认自己荒淫无度,罪该万死。即:by短语应该和褒义或者中性的动名词或者名词短语连用,类似于英语中的否定前缀un-,im-,in-,il-和ir-,只有unhappy,unsatisfied,unimpo rtant等,却没有unsad,unannoyed,untrivial等词。所以应改为:

18a This show s that,if the peop le are gained,the kingdom is gained,and if the peop le are lost,the kingdom is lost.On this account,the ruler w ill first take pains about his ow n virtue.Possessing virtue w ill give him the peop le.Possessing the peop le w ill give him the territory.Possessing the territo ry w ill give him its wealth.Possessing the wealth,he w ill have resources for expenditure.Virtue is the root;wealth is the result.

3 篇 章

篇章主要考虑修辞。和语法原则一样,修辞要考虑的东西是相对有限的,但是,书中所引用的译文还是有一个范例未能考虑周详:

19 待其酒力醒,茶烟歇,送夕阳,迎素月,亦谪居之胜概也。[1]P110

When Ibecame sane again after drunk,w hen Ifinished sipping the tea and the incense burning ended,I watched the sun setting and the brightmoon rising.Onlyat such a time did Ienjoy my life w hen Iwas a demoted official.

原文出自北宋诗人、散文家王禹偁 (954～1001)所作的《黄冈竹楼记》。和韩愈、柳宗元、范仲淹、欧阳修等文豪一样,王禹偁常因直言犯上而被贬,但是为人乐观豁达,《黄冈竹楼记》就是反应这种精神的一篇文章。他可以在小楼里听雨、赏雪、咏诗、下棋、投壶,阅读《周易》等等,字里行间毫无颓废之气。译文的失误在于“only”这个单词。因为这个单词,整篇文章的精神天翻地覆,颓废不堪:只有在那个时候我才能享受到谪居的乐趣 (Onlyat such a time did Ienjoy my life w hen Iwas a demoted official.)。所以应改为:

19a When Ibecame sane again after drunk,w hen Ifinished sipping the tea and the incense burning ended,Iwatched the sun setting and the bright moon rising,w hich was also part of my carefree life as a demoted official.

4 结束语

翻译有一个思辨的过程。上述分析,可能有不当之处,

可能郭教授早已明知,但是没有在书中加以点评,而是留给学生去发现思考。但是作为一本教材,它将是千千万万学生学习的圭臬,仔细推敲,反复讨论,实不为过,而且必须。特撰此文,不当之处,请郭教授指正。

[1]郭著章.文言英译教程 [M].上海:上海外语教育出版社,2008.

Abstract:A Course in Translation from Classical Chinese into English is a masterpiece compiled by Professo r Guo Zhuzhang from Wuhan University.However,some quoted translations need to be weighed twice from the perspectivesof diction,syntax or text to help the students w ho w ill use this book as a textbook.

Key words:A Course in Translation from Classical Chinese into English;diction;syntax;text

On the W rong Quoted Translations in A Course in Translation from Classical Chinese into English——To be corrected by Professor Guo Zhuzhang

H E Long-ping1,ZHANG Lei-lei2
(1.Department of Foreign Languages,Changsha Normal College,Changsha Hunan 410100,China;
2.Department of Foreign Languages,Huayu College,Henan Agricultural University,Shangqiu Henan 476113,China)

H315.9

A

1673-0313(2011)01-0137-04

2010-09-26

贺龙平 (1977—),男,湖南衡阳人,助教,硕士生,主要从事外国语言学及应用语言学研究。