2023年12月大学英语四、六级作文试题评析（三）

四级

Directions： Suppose the university newspaper is inviting submissions from the students for its coming edition on the recent developments in their hometown. You are now to write an essay for submission. You will have 30 minutes to write the essay. You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.

这道大学英语四级作文试题假设大学校报邀请学生投稿，内容是自己家乡最近的发展变化。由于题目中developments用的是复数形式，所以考生可以写家乡的各种最新发展变化。

这篇作文可以写三段。

第一段先指出自己在一个叫野猪坪的村子里出生和长大。这个村子位于湘西的大山里，千百年来一直与世隔绝，但是近几年却见证了巨大的变化。这样我们就引出了本文的话题。

第二段详细介绍自己家乡的各种发展变化，我们不妨从以下几个方面展开。首先，村里建起了一座新的医疗保健中心，呵护村民的健康。过去村里只有一家设备简陋的诊所。村民生了大病，经常会错过最佳治疗时机。其次，自从建了几家手工艺品厂，当地的就业机会增加了，越来越多的村民选择在自己家附近就业。最受欢迎的变化或许要数新建了一条双车道公路并开通了公交，把我们村与最近的镇子连接了起来，小孩再也不用步行上学。

第三段先指出自己家乡的各种变化令人激动、鼓舞人心，然后表明自己志愿在大学毕业后努力把家乡建设得更加美好。

下面请看参考范文：

I was born and bred in a small village called Yezhuping. For centuries， the village has lain undisturbed in the mountains of western Hunan. But in recent years it has witnessed dramatic changes.

A new health center has been built to take care of the villagers. In the past， there was only a poorly equipped clinic in my village. When they had a serious disease， villagers often missed the best opportunity for initial treatment. Another change is that there have been more local job opportunities since the foundation of several handicraft factories. An increasing number of people choose to work near their homes. Perhaps the most welcome development is that a two-lane highway has been built and a bus service has been put into operation， connecting my village to the nearest town. Children no longer need to go to school on foot.

The recent developments in my hometown are exciting and encouraging. I hope to join the effort to make it an even better place after my graduation from college. （170 words）

语言亮点借鉴：

1. I was born and bred in a small village called Yezhuping. 我在一个叫野猪坪的村子里出生和长大。be born and bred in 在……出生和长大。

2. For centuries， the village has lain undisturbed in the mountains of western Hunan. 这个村庄位于湘西的大山里，千百年来一直与世隔绝。lie 处于（某种状态）。

3. But in recent years it has witnessed dramatic changes. 但是近年来它却见证了巨大的变化。witness 见证。作此义时，句子的主语一般是某段时间或某个地点。

4. Perhaps the most welcome development is that a two-lane highway has been built and a bus service has been put into operation， connecting my village to the nearest town. 最受欢迎的发展变化或许是建了一条双车道公路，公交也已投入运营，把我们村与最近的镇子连接了起来。connecting 是现在分词作状语，表示结果。

六级

Directions： For this part， you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay that begins with the sentence “Nowadays parents are increasingly aware that allowing kids more freedom to explore and learn on their own helps foster their independence and boost their confidence.” You can make comments， cite examples or use your personal experiences to develop your essay. You should write at least 150 words but no more than 200 words （not including the sentence given）.

这道大学英语六级作文试题属于阐释观点型。此类型题目的特点是提出一个观点，要求考生论证这个观点的正确性。这道题指出，如今家长越来越意识到给予孩子更多独立探索和学习的自由有助于培养他们的独立性并增强他们的自信心。这道作文试题有点长，我们在审题时要善于简化题目、抓住关键。这道题的关键是论证为什么应该给予孩子更多独立探索和学习的自由。

本文可以写三段。

第一段先指出如今家长越来越意识到给予孩子更多独立探索和学习的自由有助于培养他们的独立性并增强他们的自信心。然后引用约翰斯·霍普金斯大学的一项研究支持这一观点。

第二段论述为什么应该给予孩子更多独立探索和学习的自由。我们不妨紧扣题目，从有助于培养孩子的独立性和增强孩子的自信心展开论证。首先，独立探索的时候，孩子们能够通过亲身体验学会把不同的经历联系起来并得出自己的结论，这自然有助于他们独立思考。此外，在探索的过程中，孩子们必须凭借自己的本领解决遇到的挑战，他们因此会变得更加自信。为了使论证更有说服力，我们不妨再从反面论证一下——缺乏探索机会的孩子经常表现得很不自信，不敢尝试新事物。

本文可以用建议法结尾。第三段先总结上文，指出探索是孩子成长中一个至关重要的部分，孩子正是通过探索来增强自信心并形成对学习的终生热爱。最后，我们水到渠成地建议家长支持孩子独立地探索和学习。

下面请看参考范文：

Nowadays parents are increasingly aware that allowing kids more freedom to explore and learn on their own helps foster their independence and boost their confidence. A Johns Hopkins University study finds that parents who provide children with opportunities to explore and learn independently see positive changes in their children.

Allowing kids to explore and learn about things they’re interested in helps promote their independence and build their confidence， two requisites for their future success. As they explore， children learn firsthand to make connections between different experiences and arrive at their own conclusions. This naturally helps them to become independent thinkers. In addition， when they explore， children have to overcome challenges they encounter. In doing this， they will be more confident in their abilities. Conversely， children lacking opportunities to explore are often so unsure of themselves that they hardly dare to experiment with new things.

Exploring is a critical component of children’s development. It is through exploration that children increase their self-confidence and develop a lifelong love for learning. Therefore， parents should support their children in exploring and learning on their own. （181 words）

语言亮点借鉴：

1. Allowing kids to explore and learn about things they’re interested in helps promote their independence and build their confidence， two requisites for their future success. 让孩子探索和学习自己感兴趣的事物有助于提高他们的独立性并增强他们的自信心——这是他们未来获得成功的两个必要条件。build confidence 使（信心或信任）逐渐增强。

2. In doing this， they will be more confident in their abilities. 在此过程中，他们会对自己的本领更加自信。in 在……方面。

3. Conversely， children lacking opportunities to explore are often so unsure of themselves that they hardly dare to experiment with new things. 相反，缺乏探索机会的孩子经常表现得很不自信，不敢尝试新事物。conversely 相反地，反过来。这是作正反论证的一个常用过渡语。

4. It is through exploration that children increase their self-confidence and develop a lifelong love for learning. 孩子正是通过探索来增强自信心并形成对学习的终生热爱。

* 上海外国语大学国际新闻硕士，讲师，专注大学英语写作教学十余年。