“读后续写”写作策略指导

◆南京航空航天大学附属高级中学 沈伟

从2021年起，江苏高考将采用全国卷，书面表达部分将改为两节：第一节为应用文，第二节为读后续写或概要写作。我们今天着重指导同学们如何进行读后续写。

《普通高等学校招生全国统一考试英语科考试说明（高考综合改革试验省份试用）（第一版）》（以下简称《考试说明》）对“读后续写”的具体要求如下：提供一段350词以内的语言材料，要求考生依据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词进行续写（150词左右），将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。下面我们以2018年6月的浙江英语高考题为例，指导同学们如何完成读后续写任务。

【原题复现】

第二节 读后续写（满分25分）

阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。

It was summer, and my dad wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before.He decided to take me on a trip to the Wild West.

We took a plane to Albuquerque, a big city in the state of New Mexico.We reached Albuquerque in the late afternoon.Uncle Paul, my dad’s friend, picked us up from the airport and drove us up to his farm in Pecos.

His wife Tina cooked us a delicious dinner and we got to know his sons Ryan and Kyle.My dad and I spent the night in the guestroom of the farm house listening to the frogs and water rolling down the river nearby.Very early in the morning, Uncle Paul woke us up to have breakfast.“The day starts at dawn on my farm,” he said.After breakfast, I went to help Aunt Tina feed the chickens, while my dad went with Uncle Paul to take the sheep out to graze (吃草).I was impressed to see my dad and Uncle Paul riding horses.They looked really cool.

In the afternoon, I asked Uncle Paul if I could take a horse ride, and he said yes, as long as my dad went with me.I wasn’t going to take a horse ride by myself anyway.So, my dad and I put on our new cowboy hats, got on our horses, and headed slowly towards the mountains.“Don’t be late for supper,” Uncle Paul cried, “and keep to the track so that you don’t get lost!” “OK!” my dad cried back.After a while Uncle Paul and his farm house were out of sight.It was so peaceful and quiet and the colours of the brown rocks, the deep green pine trees, and the late afternoon sun mixed to create a magic scene.It looked like a beautiful woven (编织的)blanket spread out upon the ground just for us.

注意：

1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；

2.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语；

3.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；

4.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。

Paragraph 1：Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.

Paragraph 2：We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.

【写作指导】

整个写作可以按三个步骤进行：

1.分析所给材料，归纳文本大意

原文材料多为记叙文，从叙事要素出发，我们可以先找出基本要素，归纳文章大意并梳理逻辑关系。

叙事要素 你的答案人物(characters)I, Dad, Uncle Paul, Tina...时间(time)summer vacation, afternoon地点(place)on a farm, New Mexico, the Wild West情节(plot)During summer, Dad and I went on vacation, to Uncle Paul’s farm.We took a horse ride...主题(topic)adventure, nature, vacation...

本文大意为，暑假里“爸爸”带“我”到西部农场保罗叔叔家里。农场上的自然风光很美，蒂娜阿姨用美食款待我们。“我”请求保罗叔叔允许“我”出去骑骑马。保罗叔叔要求“爸爸”陪同“我”去，并嘱咐“我们”要沿着大路走，否则会迷路。于是“我们”就出发了。

文章中重要的提示性内容，希望同学们用波浪线标记。例如，保罗叔叔的嘱咐暗示了山路可能比较复杂，容易迷路等等。刚开始接触这种题型，大家可能不容易找到提示。不用太担心，通过不断的训练，同学们会对提示内容更加敏感。

2.分析下划线词，初步设定用法

下划线词组是写作的重要提示，必须给予足够的重视。至少5个下划线关键词语，能够保障同学们扣住主题。如下图是某位同学的分析：

根据划线词的提示，续写中人物应包括“爸爸”和保罗叔叔。至于其他几个关键词，如河流、羊群、农场小屋等，可以是风景，也可以是找路的提示。原文的一个语言特点是风景描写（阴影标出），除了考虑续写内容，还要在语言风格方面尽可能保持一致，续写中也应描写景色，尽量用词优美，像原文那样令人心旷心怡。

同学们不要轻视小词，而要学着玩味，思考它为什么会被选为划线词。如“late”, 原文中保罗叔叔嘱咐我们晚饭别迟，既是礼貌，也是时间的暗示，是对续写部分进行暗示：山路复杂，他担心我们迷路，叮嘱我们不要太晚回来。考虑到这一层，你的续写中就有了很好的呼应点：时间太迟，保罗叔叔出于担心来找我们，或者天色渐晚增添紧张气氛，又或者视线随着暮色降临变差，所以找不到路等等。同学们不妨发散思维，适当联想。

3.分析段落开头，确定情节梗概

同学们除了细读材料，也要抓住所给开头的提示。

Paragraph 1:Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.

Paragraph 2:We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.

波浪线的部分其实是续写的中心内容。如果同学们没有抓住“迷路”这一点，你的续写就跑题了。第一段开头“突然一只兔子跳到了我的马前”。作用是什么呢？联系主题，应该把这只兔子的意外出现理解为迷路的诱因，即小兔子吸引“我”离开了主路。第一段的结尾处就要体现迷路，才能和第二段开头自然衔接，而第二段再继续讲迷路之后的情节和感受。如果你的思路打不开，不妨顺着以下的问题链，开始头脑风暴吧！

以上步骤能够帮助同学们理出情节和感受两条主线，捕捉提示信息。下面是一份浙江省高考满分作文，供大家参考。

Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.It was so cute that I was completely attracted by it.It jumped and ate along the way and we decided to follow it.The clouds were drifting in the sky and the river was flowing peacefully.Everything was bathed in the setting sun and we were spellbound by the breath-taking scenery.Abruptly, the rabbit was gone before we realized it.What’s worse, we desperately found we had got lost.

We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.Minutes ticked away and it was getting late.Sheep were nowhere to be found.Everything began to disappear in the dark.Don’t panic.My dad comforted me and we started to search for the track.Luckily, there was a faint cry from a distance.That is Uncle Paul! My heart was pounding wildly with excitement.We tried our best to recognize the direction and then headed for it.Several minutes later, the farm house came into our sight and we were all relieved.In the end, that day became a really thrilling but joyful memory in my mind.

这篇作文准确地抓住了内容和情感两条线，和原文多处呼应。对自然景色的描写十分有吸引力，用词地道，句式高级，亮点颇多。

另外，我们请高考阅卷老师总结了当年考生失分点，并提出建议：

① 续写应以叙事为主。很多考生的续写中对话太多，文章衔接会较弱；

② 词汇对正确理解原文很关键，如不少学生看不懂track，直接导致跑题。

③ 考生的审题能力薄弱。有些学生甚至不明白第二段首句中的we指代谁，写成“我”一个人迷路或保罗叔叔甚至他一家人和“我”一起迷路。

④ 考生的语言普遍较乏味，缺少文采。建议同学们平时从写对句子开始，多欣赏模仿原汁原味的佳句，老师加强情景应用指导。高分作文的用词和句式都很高级。建议同学们多摘抄描述性语言，并在日常写作中积极运用，以求内化。

⑤ 主题不过分拔高。续写中可以考虑以具体细节表达诸如父爱、热爱自然、体验生存等主题。但是切忌为写而写。

⑥ 功夫在平时。同学们应重视文学作品的学习，赏析语言。