This is me!

郑云

近日，你班正在评选体育主播，你打算参评。请结合特长介绍自己，表达出对体育的热爱。

Hello， everyone！ My name is Tom. I am a student in Class 9， Grade 7.

I am tall and thin. I have black hair and a round face. My eyes are not big. I often have a smile on my face. I am a friendly boy.

I like reading and many kinds of sports. Basketball is my favourite. I began to play it when I was five years old. I usually run on the playground after school. Now， I am a member of the school basketball team. Last month， our team won two matches and I felt happy.

Among all the basketball players， I like Yao Ming best. He is so cool. In the future， I will practise hard and I want to be a basketball player like him！

可适当增加连接词和过渡句，使文章显得紧凑、有层次，表达更加流畅自然。

本段落需要紧扣段落中心，具体描述作者的爱好和特长，此处遗漏写作要点——特长。

此句与“爱好和特长”无关。

此处“cool”不能准确表达姚明是偶像的原因。

建议用富有情感的语言表达对实现梦想的渴望。

Hello， everyone！ My name is Tom. I am a student in Class 9， Grade 7.

I am tall and thin. I have black hair and a round face. My eyes are not big， but they are bright. I often have a smile on my face and everyone thinks I am very friendly.

I love reading because I think it makes me know many things about the world. I also like many kinds of sports like football， badminton and basketball. Basketball is my favourite and I really do well in it. I began to play it when I was five years old. I often run on the playground after school. Now， I am a member of the school basketball team.

Among all the basketball players， I like Yao Ming best. He plays basketball very well and often helps his team come first in the match， so he is my hero. In the future， I will practise harder and I want to be a basketball player like him. I hope my dream will come true someday！

（江蘇省靖江市实验学校 陈垚竹）

本篇书面表达的主题是自我介绍，全文紧扣评选体育主播这个话题，结构合理，条理清晰，逻辑性强，体现了小作者积极向上的生活态度。

文章语言生动、流畅、精练，句式富有变化，时态把握准确。小作者能灵活运用七年级英语教材Unit 1和Unit 2所学的新短语和句式来表达外貌、爱好、特长、偶像和梦想等，也能较好地运用but， and， so， because， when等连词，使文章紧凑，富有层次感。