My Progress 陈传光

本期点评名师

陈传光男，江苏省连云港市罗阳中学高级教师、连云港市优秀教育园丁、江苏省教育学会会员，从事教育教学工作多年；曾获英语教研能力大赛区一等奖、英语专业技能大赛市一等奖、班主任基本功大赛市一等奖；有多篇论文在各核心和主流期刊上发表；曾指导学生在各类竞赛中取得不错的成绩，有多人获得地市级奖和省级奖。

My Progress

Life is always full of difficulties， but when we overcome it ①， we willmake great progress.

I couldnt swim when I was twelve so I thought it was too hard. In order toencourage me learning②to swim， my father often took me to the swimming pool. Atfirst， I didnt like swimming at all. But through hard work and continuous practice，I finally learned how to swim. Now， I can swim more than 500 meters， but③I havemade great progress.

Just as a famous saying goes， nothing is difficult if you put your heart into it.No matter what difficulties we face， we will make progress if we work hard.

江苏省连云港市罗阳中学 张静贤

点评

优点：

小作者用不长的篇幅讲述了一个完整的故事，有起因、过程、结果，篇尾得出了人生哲理，使短文主题得以升华。总之，这是一篇不错的学生习作。

需要修改的地方：

①it 改为them。代指上文中的复数名词difficulties，應使用them。

②learning 改为to learn。encourage sb. to do sth.意为“鼓励某人做某事”。

③but 改为and。此处上下文是并列关系。

评分：

按江苏省连云港市中考英语作文满分25分的评分标准，本文修改前可得22分。