诸立忠
在我们的人生历程中,有许多事值得我们在以后的生活中去不断地回味,对这些难忘的经历,我们一定想要将它们变成文字,珍藏起来。如何记述这些难忘经历?请看今天的写作话题———
首先我们一起来看一则写作实例:
放学回到家,Tony发现父母都不在,便开始做起了作业。直到十一点父母才回来,之前从没有一个人单独在家的13岁的他有了一次难忘的经历。当门外有人走过时他害怕;听到外面的房间好像有什么动静,他更是害怕,后来才发现是自己的小猫。
根据上面的提示以“My Unforgettable Experience”为题用第一人称写一则短文,可适当增加内容。
一、分析提示,把握写作主题
由提示及所给的标题可知这里所描述的主题应是“I”(Tony)第一次一个人在家时的难忘经历。明确主题应为: My Unforgettable Experience。
二、构思写作顺序
确定了主题后,接下来需要构思好写作的步骤。描述经历的文章当属叙事类,说明时可按事件发生的顺序进行描述。开始可说明与事件相关的人及时间,或开篇点题,说明这是一次难忘的经历,随后说明事情发生的时间、地点及相关人物。在叙述事情经过的时候重点应突出“unforgettable”,针对这篇文章写作的重点应放在描写当时让“I”感到恐惧的环境的渲染上。文章结尾可总结全文,进一步说明这是一次难忘的经历,突出主题。
三、写作范文
My Unforgettable Experience
Have you got any unforgettable experience? Well, let me tell you one of my unforgettable experiences.
One afternoon I came back from school and found that my parents weren't in. You know, I was only 13 years old. I never stayed at home alone before. So I felt a little afraid. When I was doing my homework in my bedroom, I heard someone walking outside. Then I felt even more frightened. However, just at that moment, I heard a great noise in the next room. Was anyone there? Was it a robber or a thief? You couldn't imagine my feeling then. I was too scared to move. Then my door opened. I found my cat enter my room. It frightened me. Then I began to laugh. I stayed at home alone until eleven when my parents returned.
I think it's my unforgettable experience because it was the first time that I stayed in a place alone.
四、范文點评
这篇文章叙述了作者第一次一个人呆在家的难忘经历,语句表达准确、通顺,句式多变,用词也很有讲究,如几个表示害怕的词afraid, frightened, scared的使用避免了用词的单调。文章首尾呼应,结构严谨。特别是重点描述了一个人在家的经历,重点突出,较好地表达了主题。
五、写作练笔
根据下文提示描述一次难忘的经历。
1. 上周六去野餐,头一天晚上做了准备,买了许多食物,烧了一些饭菜。
2. 一大早就来到乡间,山脚下、树林旁、小河边到处鸟语花香。
3. 大家又唱又跳,品尝食物。最后我们跳入水中和鱼儿嬉戏。
4. 大家都度过了愉快的一天。
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