餐桌上的学问

餐桌上的学问

Fun fact: Sticking your chopsticks vertically in a bowl of rice is taboo, as it resembles incense sticks that the Chinese traditionally burn in honour of deceased loved ones.

How many times have you heard, “No elbows on the table!” or, “Chew with your mouth closed!”Growing up, I heard this every night, so by the time I moved to China in 2003, I was pretty con fi dent in my table mannerisms. That is, until I found my friends staring wide-eyed in shock as I stuck my chopsticks upright in my bowl of rice. Not cool, apparently. I'd just incensed my new (and few) friends. As a gesture of apology (and to serve them), I used my rice-infused chopsticks to turn over the fi sh… and all hell broke loose. Again.

In China, it's easy to make rookie mistakes and little blunders that label you as a newcomer. If you happen to get invited to a formal meal, here are some tried and tested tips to avoid being the centre of (unwanted) attention.

Tap for tea to say thanks. When someone pours tea into your cup, lightly tap the table with your index and middle fi nger

COLUMNIST’S PROFILE

Lena Gidwani is a resident of Guangzhou for 13 years, selfconfessed networker, magazine editor and an avid writer.

Lena Gidwani，网络工作者、杂志编辑、作家，在广州居住13年。

a couple of times. Legend has it that an emperor, in an attempt to hide his identity, poured tea for his servant, who consequently tapped his fi ngers as a show of respect.

An even number of dishes is best. Odd numbers symbolise death. Order in even numbers to ensure a balance of yin and yang, but avoid the number four as it is considered unlucky.

Be considerate. Always serve others before you serve yourself. It's also uncouth to attack the lazy suzy tabletop like you would a Frisbee, or use your chopsticks to burrow through the food and dig for treasures. What you deserve will be served to you, said Confucius.

Let your host or elders eat fi rst. Remember that your elders made it through school without Google or Wikipedia, so the least you can do is allow them to initiate the festivities. And when toasting, use both hands to show respect.

Elegance is key. It's really simple: don't be a slob and don't spit out bones even though you've noticed many doing it. Try everything even though it looks weird and never take the last piece of anything. It's considered bad luck and shows your greed.

If you've realised that the fi rst letter of each of the fi ve tips make up the word TABLE, tap yourself on your back. Well done, and what an easy way to remember your manners!

Now for the best part – the little game of “Who will pay the bill?” This is where you, my dear newbie, will shine if you do as instructed. First, make a beeline for the bill, even though you secretly know that the host will pay for it. Your host will also grab it; he or she can't let you pay as it means that they cannot afford the meal. Secondly, continue to argue; failure to do so insinuates that your host owes you something. Thirdly, with a heavy sigh, graciously thank and accept their hospitality. Enjoy the experience; there will be many more bills coming your way to pay.

“手肘不许放桌上” ，“吃东西要闭上嘴”，我从小听着这些规矩长大，所以来中国后，我对餐桌礼仪胸有成竹。直到一天，朋友们被我惊得目瞪口呆——我把筷子直直地插在米饭上。在中国，这表示我在祭奠他们。为表歉意，我想招呼他们吃鱼，就用沾满饭粒的筷子翻了一下鱼……结果，天又塌了。

初来中国的人很容易触及雷区。如果被邀参加正式的会餐，可以参考下列“血泪”经验，以免成为焦点。

•叩桌对倒茶的人表示谢意。有人为你倒茶时，应用食指及中指轻敲几次桌面。

•菜品数量以偶数为佳。为保持阴阳平衡，菜品的数量采用属阴的偶数。但切记避开4，4不吉利。

•体贴他人。要先照顾他人用餐。飞掷餐具、用筷子翻搅菜都是没有教养的行为。

•主人和长辈优先。长辈们比我们艰苦，要让他们在宴会上先开动。祝酒时要用双手，以示敬意。

•优雅很关键。举止不粗俗，别夹菜盘里最后一棵菜，会带来坏运，也会显得你贪心。

买单环节最精彩。新人若能按以下建议行事，绝对出彩。首先，即便知道主人会买单，也要抢账单。主人会抢回去，不然显得他们没钱。接着，继续抢，不抢就好像主人本来亏欠了你。最后，重重叹口气，优雅地感谢主人的款待。别急，将来，还有大把账单等着你买。

LOCAL TABLE NICETIES

Text by Lena Gidwani Photo by CFP Translation by Emma Xu