2014年广东高考读写任务题分析及备考建议

2014-10-10 00:34刘晓斌
广东教育·高中 2014年9期
关键词:短句段落原文

刘晓斌

2014年广东省普通高考英语读写任务题要求考生阅读完一篇关于捐助的短文,然后按要求写一篇150词左右的英语短文。写作内容应包括:

1. 以约30个词概括短文的主要内容。

2. 以约120个词就主人公的捐助行为谈谈想法,内容包括:

(1)如何看待主人公的捐助行为;

(2)你认为她的捐助对受惠学生有哪些影响;

(3)如果你自己要捐助,你会选择哪个群体并陈述理由。

一、试题特色

该题目内容是充满“正能量”的话题,且主题内容难度适中,一般考生略加思考便能展开写作和陈述,话题设计的意图一般不会出现“词穷”的情况。因此,一般的考生基本能按照要求概括出主要的信息点,主题比较明确,一般不会出现跑题的情况,且篇章结构一般都能做到基本连贯。在能力上,本题与往年一样依然考查考生提取文章主要内容、梳理概括要点、组织语义连贯的语篇、表达自己的观点与态度的能力。因此可以认为今年的读写任务题目要求清晰,与往年的难度有很大的相似度。

二、考场作文分析

下面根据阅卷过程中发现的较为突出的问题,谈谈如何概括要点和增加作文亮点。

1. 从文章结构的特点把握要点。

概括部分应包括的要点如下:(1)Miss McCarty donated her life saving to a university. (2) She worked as a laundrywoman and lived a very simple life. (3) She was very happy to give her money to students in need.

以上要点出现的位置在下划线部分:

Oseola McCarty spent more than 75 years washing and ironing other peoples clothes. As a laundrywoman, she was paid only a few dollars each time. Certainly nobody would consider her rich, so they were all amazed when Miss McCarty decided to donate $150,000 to the University of Southern Mississippi.

The money was in fact her life savings. She could save such a large amount of money because she lived a vey simple life. She never learned to drive, and when she wanted to go somewhere, she just walked. She never flew to anywhere till the donation(捐赠) and in 50 years she had been out of the South only once. The house in which she lived was also a rather modest one her last uncle left her. Only after she became known in America did she begin to travel all over the country. Since then, she had been the subject of many interviews and articles and was even invited to the White House.

Her donation was for students who clearly needed financial help. She herself left school in the sixth grade and had never married or had children. She said to the reporters that the idea of helping somebodys child go to college gave her much pleasure.

从文中的来源可以看出,本文的三个要点基本上是各段的主题句或最能体现本文或本段大意的句子。因此在解题过程中,学生必须学会如何抓住文章各段的主题句,其前提是必须对文章的结构有个比较清晰的了解。从上文可以看出,三个信息点有规律地出现在各段的尾句或者首句,这是英文中典型的行文结构,这种结构在英文中非常普遍。读写任务所提供的文章,大多数是记叙文和议论文,而这两类体裁的文章,其主题句出现的位置都有许多相似之处。

对于概括部分的评价,除了要求要点信息齐全之外,还要求不能增加与原文无关的信息、不能照抄原文句子,且语言结构正确、行文规范。如下面一段话概括得比较好:

Although Oseola McCarty, a laundrywoman, wasnt wealthy and lived a simple life, she decided to donate $ 150,000, her life savings, to help the students in need, which gave her much pleasure.

很多学生在复习如何进行概括的时候,为了避免照抄原文句子,常试图对主题句的谓语动词改用其他同义动词或词组代替。然而这种做法对于许多学生来说难度较高,因为高中生的词汇量不会太大,如何在有限的词汇中选择同义词进行替换是一大难题。从上面这段话我们可以看到,原文中出现的动词词组如live a simple life,donate $150,000,gave her much pleasure等,都在上面的概括句中原封不动地出现。然而该生巧妙地把上述主题句重新组合、排列,再把这些来自原文的动词短语置于不同的位置,这样就避免出现了照抄原句的嫌疑,同时亦可看出其对句子结构的熟练程度,达到了检测目的。endprint

因此,在概括部分,除了必须熟练掌握文章结构之外,也必须善于利用句子结构的变化来生成新的句子。

2. 注意表达的多样性。

写作表达的多样性(variety),指的是用多种方式来表达相似的意思,或者用多种不同的结构来组织句子和篇章。多样性通常体现在遣词造句中,一般有三种情况:词汇的多样性、短语搭配的多样性以及句型结构的多样性。此外,写作的多样性还表现在,尽量避免使用口语化的、其他人常用的表达方式。比如说,大多数人都会用more and more people 来表达“越来越多的人”之意,尽管这种表达没有错误,但往往不能形成写作表达中的亮点,像People in growing/mounting/increasing/expanding numbers等表述方式就能体现出表达的多样性。

因此,可以说,表达的多样性,是区分作者是否达到一定写作水平的一个标准。在高考写作中,不同得分档次的作文,其表达的多样性有显著的区别。如下面这段话:

If I need to donate, I will donate to the homeless children. Because they are young. They need care. But their parents cant help them. They are flowers. They need donation. We should give hope to them. Let their life change better.

上面这段话中,句子大多通顺且没有语法错误。然而这段话的特点是大量短句的简单堆砌,使人读起来感觉很平淡,让人觉得表达手法稚嫩。另外篇章连贯性也较差。

对比下面这段话:

I would donate to those poor children. First, children are the societys next generation. Only with enough education can they better serve others and contribute to the society. Whats more, they have little ability to earn money and it's not their responsibility for not receive education. Last but not least, it is children who are innocent and pretty that make our society more beautiful and harmonious. As a consequence of our help, they have equal right to go to school as other children do.

可以看出,作者运用了各种句式结构来表达。同时,整个段落的逻辑性非常强,主要体现在first, whats more, last but not least, as a consequence of等连接性短语和副词的使用,使句子之间的关系更为紧密,读起来有很强的连贯性。

然而必须指出,写作中并非越多长句越好,也并非句子越长越好。上面这段话也是个很好的例子。段落开始第一句话I would donate to those poor children.用言简意赅的方式表达了作者的观点,随后作者展开的论述都围绕这句话进行。一个段落中,长、短句的结合使用是写作表达的常见方式。如在段落中连续用了几个长句,最后以一个短句进行点题的结尾方式,显得有气势,或者能强烈地表达语境中的特定语气。

因此在平时的写作练习中,我们不能满足于写正确的句子,更应该善于运用一定的写作手法写出富有新意的句子和逻辑性强的段落篇章,而多样性是最基本的方法。

(作者单位:华南师范大学外国语言文化学院)

责任编校 蒋小青endprint

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