续写要“说”好，就用这四招

彭晓玲

对话描写在续写中有着重要的作用，它可以揭示人物的性格和个性，以及当时的心理状态或情感表现。那么如何准确、生动地进行对话描写呢？

一、用具体的动词

如果我们笼统地使用“sb says/said， ...”就会显得过于单调呆板，但如果我们学会用一些具体传神、画面感强的动词，就会更加生动。如：

叫喊：shout（叫喊）， scream/squeal（尖叫）， exclaim（惊叫）， yell out/cry out（叫喊）

答复：answer/reply/respond（回答）

其它：ask（问），add（补充说）， repeat（重复道）， report（报道）， explain（解释道， sigh（叹着气说）， sob/cry（哭诉）， comfort（安慰道）， promise（承诺道）， propose/ suggest（建议），agree（同意），whisper/murmur/mumble（咕哝地说）， stutter（结巴地说）

Examples：

“With your encouragement，”Jack “I am full of confidence.”杰克还补充说“有你的鼓励，我信心满满的。”

Suddenly Jack “Oh， no， the background music for my speech is deleted by accident.”突然杰克发出一声尖叫“为演讲配的背景音乐无意间被删除了。”

“What a big trouble，”but Lily him，“Take it easy， there is still time to make up for it.”“麻烦大了”但李莉安慰他说“别急，還有时间去弥补。”

Jack “My heart is aching.”杰克咕哝着“我的心在痛。”

After a slight pause， Jack “Lily， you are right.”稍停片刻后，杰克赞同李莉说，“你说得对。”

二、增加介词短语

虽然say， ask等动词普通，但如果加上with...或in...等介词短语，可以表现出说话者的语气、神态、声音和情感，达到传神的效果，使对话描写更加生动。

1. 增加in /with...

（1）in a ... voice表达声音

in a low voice低声地;in a high voice高声地;in a soft voice以一种轻柔的口吻; in a sweet voice娇声细语地

（2）in a ... tone表达语气

in a pleasant tone 以一种愉悦的口气;in a firm tone 以坚定的语调;in a curious tone以好奇的口吻;in a impatient tone 以不耐烦地语气;in a rude tone以不礼貌的语气;in a frightened tone以受惊的语调

（3）in/with... 表达感情

in surprise惊奇地;in shock在惊吓中;in horror惊恐地;in sorrow悲伤地;in doubt不能肯定的

with delight欣然;with excitement怀着激动的心情;with satisfaction满意地;with pride骄傲地;with embarrassment尴尬地;with patience耐心地;with certainty确定无疑地

Examples：

“I will never do that again，”I answered .“我再也不会那样做了，”我语气坚定地回答。

“It will definitely be an unforgettable experience，”she unconsciously a smile spreading over his face.“这一定会是一次难忘的经历，”她低声说，脸上不自觉地绽开了笑容。

“ What’s this ？ ”Kate said， eyes staring at the box on the table.“这是什么？”凯特兴奋地说，眼睛盯着桌子上的盒子。

“ I don’t mean that ，”Emily said and ten lowered his head.“我不是这个意思，”埃米莉，尴尬地说，然后低下了头。

2. 增加with +宾语+宾补

she said，“Here， Mum. It’s for you.”用颤抖的声音说，“妈妈，给你。这是给你的。”

， she said，“ It’s very kind of you， Dad！”她笑着说，“爸爸，您真是太好了！

“I was innocent. Never did I kill anyone，”he cried， “我是无辜的。我从来没有杀过人，”他叫道，喉咙发紧，双腿发软。

“What’s it， Jenny？ What’s the matter？”the boy said with his lips trembling.“什么事，珍妮？出什么事了？ ”男孩说，他的嘴唇在颤抖着。

三、增加分词短语

典型句型： Doing...，“...”sb said.

Examples：

“I was innocent.”想到自己会被判刑，他解释说，“我是无辜的。”

， he apologized，“Mum， I am so sorry and thank you all you have done for me.”他跪在地上道歉说，“妈妈，对不起，谢谢您为我所做的一切。”

Dad said calmly，“Everything will be OK ！”爸爸安慰着妈妈，平静地说，“一切都会好起来的！”

Marry said，“It is a secret.”玛丽把手指放在嘴唇上说，“这是秘密。”

四、增加状语从句

典型句型：“...”sb said， as/when/as if...

Examples：

“Where is my necklace？”Jenny asked， “我的项链在哪里？”珍妮一边焦急地擦着额头上的汗水，一边问道。

After searching it for a long time， “Where is my necklace？”Jenny said hopelessly 找了很长时间之后，“我的项链在哪里？”珍妮绝望地说，好像她被打败了。

After searching it for a long time，“Where is my necklace？” Jenny sighed 找了很长时间之后，“我的项链在哪里？”珍妮坐在沙发上叹了口气。

“Don’t panic！”father comforted them 别慌！”父亲一边安慰他们，一边帮他们很快地清理干净。

情景写作

前文梗概：Taylor先生第一次和两个儿子Harry和Joel一起徒步旅行。然而，Harry和Joel为徒步旅行的前三英里而争吵。结果后来惹得Taylor先生生气了，他的左脚被树根缠住了，在泥泞的河岸上滑来滑去，掉进了路旁的河里。两个儿子前去帮助父亲，幸好，浑身湿透的父亲发现自己只是受了点轻伤。

Paragraph 1.

But his glasses came off when he fell in the water. Seeing this， Harry and Joel were seized by a sense of anxiety so that they rushed to the river where their father fell to search for the glasses. However， with the water running quite rapidly， all their efforts were in vain. Without his glasses， Mr. Taylor couldn’t see， not to mention recognizing the way.______________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

（请用“分词短语，with +宾语+宾补”结构描写兄弟俩“互相埋怨，引发争执”的对话）. Another fierce argument broke out.

Paragraph 2.

“Just calm down.”Mr. Taylor shouted，“ Without my glasses， we need to work together to find our way.”After hearing this， they stopped arguing.____________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________（請用具体动词“apologize， add”及“增加in /with...”结构描写兄弟俩“认错道歉，团结合作”的对话）. Mr. Taylor pulled the map and the compass out. Luckily， Joel learned how to read a map from his books， and Harry knew how to use a compass from his hiking club.With Joel studying the map to search for the river， Harry used the compass to find the direction. Finally， they made it. In relief， Mr. Taylor beamed proudly，“ It is you two that save the day.”Delightedly/With delight in heart， Joel and Harry smiled to each other ， walking their path with love.

参考答案：

Para 1. Glaring at Joe，“What should we do？We are lost.” Harry cried 或“What should we do？We are lost.”Harry cried with his eyes burning.“It’s all your fault！”Harry continued， and voice trembled with anger.“Don’t just blame others.”Joel shouted back.

Para 2. Harry apologized in an embarrassing tone/with embarrassment“ I’m sorry， Dad. I am too anxious to control my temper.”“ I am sorry too.”Joel added，“ Let’s try to solve the problem together .”