My Life Because of You

向红

Dear Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis1，

亲爱的青少年类风湿性关节炎：

You are in my soul since birth. You are born and you get my immune system2 because there is something wrong with my joints3. My immune system attacks me， causing my pain. Im a seven-year-old girl with chocolaty brown eyes， long flowing hair， and an innocent face， now in pain because of you.

从出生开始，你就在我的灵魂中。你是遗传性的，你操纵我的免疫系统因为我的关节有问题。我的免疫系统攻击我，让我觉得很痛苦。我本是一个七岁的女孩，有着巧克力般棕色的眼睛，长长飘逸的长发和一张天真无邪的脸，却因为你如此痛苦。

You are the smell of antiseptic4 as I enter the infinite number of hospitals and doctors offices. You let needles into my skin to drink my blood， the tears racing down my face. The constant pain has taken away my innocence5. “If God is so great， if he really does love me， then why would he do this to me？” I screamed at my grandmother.

因为无数次出入医院和医生办公室，所以你是一股防腐剂的味道。你让针头穿透我的皮肤吞噬我的血液，泪水从我的脸上流下来，不断的痛苦夺走了我的天真。“如果上帝如此伟大，如果他真的爱我，那么他为什么要这样对我呢？”我对奶奶尖叫道。

I want to thank you for this. If I was not bound to you， I would not be the person I am. Ive become a compassionate6 and firm young lady. I want to change the world， I want to help people， and see the impact I make. I have this dream because of what you put me through. Ive been affected by pain everyday. I dont want others to be put through this.

我要感谢你。如果我没有被你束缚，我就不会是现在的我。我现在是一个富有同情心而坚强的年轻女性。我想改变世界，我想帮助别人，我想看看我带来的影响。我之所以会这么想是因为你，我每天受到痛苦折磨，不希望别人也受这种折磨。

For the past nine years， Ive had doctor appointments every year， sometimes more often depending how badly you were affecting me.

在过去的九年里，我每年都要预约医生，有时可能次数更频繁，这取决于为你对我造成的影响有多严重。

Yes， I am grateful to you， but I would never wish you upon someone else. You are genetic. You could have happen on one of my sisters， Kristen or Emily. I did not hope that walking into a room to see tears leaking from Kristens face. I dont want one day， little Emily missed school because of you， increasing her homework. I would use my arms to protect them from the evil of the world. I would gladly balance this burden7 for them.

是的，我很感激你，但我永遠不希望你和别人在一起。你是遗传性的，本可以在我的姐妹克里斯汀或艾米丽身上出现。但我不希望走进一间房，看到克里斯汀脸上流下的泪水，也不希望有一天小艾米丽因为你错过了上学的时间，导致作业增多。我会用手臂保护她们免受世间邪恶的伤害。我很乐意为她们减轻这个负担。

Youve taught me the importance of family. When you enter my life， everyone was scared， especially me. They hid their fear， took my little hands， and we stood against you as a family. It was always the little things that helped the most. My grandma hated that I had all these medicines and kept trying to find anthers. She even planted yellow tomatoes in her garden just for me because acidic8 foods are harmful to you. My aunt helped me with my medication. My parents were probably hit the hardest by you， because I was their first child and they had to face the fears of any new parent. Im so lucky to have them because they have been so supportive9 along the way.

你教会了我家庭的重要性。当你进入我的生活时，每个人都害怕，尤其是我。他们隐藏了心里的恐惧，抓住了我的小手，我们全家团结在一起和你斗争。总是最小的事情给我最多帮助。我的奶奶讨厌我要吃的药，并一直试图找到其他替代的东西。她甚至在我的花园里种植黄色西红柿，因为酸性食物对你有害。我的阿姨喂我吃药帮我打针。我的父母受到的打击是最大的，因为我是他们的第一个孩子，他们不得不面对初为父母的恐惧。我很幸运能有这样的家人，因为他们一路上都非常支持我。

The doctor said， “It turns good， really good. I think you are in remission10.” I let out a breath and a laugh. My joy spilled out of my eyes. For the first time in years， I felt like I could breathe free.

“病情好转了，非常好。我想你的病情有所缓解。”医生说。我呼出了一口气，笑了，眼中溢出喜悦的泪水。这是多年来的第一次，我觉得我可以自由呼吸。

Notes

1. Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis [     ] [     ] [     ] n. 青少年类风湿性关节炎

2. immune system [     ] [     ] n. 免疫系统

3. joint [     ] n. 關节;接缝;接合处，接合点

4. antiseptic [     ] n. 防腐剂，抗菌剂

5. innocence [     ] n. 天真无邪

6. compassionate [     ] adj. 慈悲的;富于同情心的

7. burden [     ] n. 负担;责任

8. acidic [     ] adj. 酸的，酸性的;产生酸的

9. supportive [     ] adj. 支持的;支援的;赞助的

10. remission [     ] n. 缓解;宽恕;豁免