【栏目要求】
1. 将学生习作根据中考分值给出成绩; 2. 在应该修改的地方划线并标注序号;
3. 根据所标序号进行修改并说明修改的理由; 4. 给学生习作点评<优点与不足>;
5. 请点评名师提供简历一份,包括:学校、职务、 职称、荣誉、教研教学成果、照片一张。
投稿邮箱: zxsyy2007@163.com或whzxsyy@163.com
来稿请寄: 430079 华中师范大学外国语学院《中学生英语》 杂志社 收
本 期 点 评 名 师
陈传光 男,中学一级教师,江苏省赣榆县罗阳中学,从事教育教学工作十余载。江苏省教育学会会员,连云港市优秀教育园丁,赣榆县优秀班主任。有多篇论文在各杂志期刊上发表并获奖。曾获全国中学生新课程英语语言能力竞赛优秀辅导教师一等奖。
My Hometown
In the east of China, there is a small city—Jinhua. It is my hometown and I was born there.
Jinhua is not only ancient but also modern. It has a long history. It is hot in summer and cold in winter. There are many places of interest in Jinhua. There are a lot of old buildings, mountains, lakes and rivers there. And the River Wu flows across① Jinhua. Every year thousands of Chinese and foreigners visit Jinhua. It is really a nice place to visit.
My hometown is a beautiful city. On each side of the roads, there are some tall trees and beautiful flowers. The roads are also very clean. You can usually see white clouds in the blue sky. If you come here, you will love it. And there are also many delicious foods here, such as Jinhua ham, oranges and so on.
In a word, Jinhua is the best city in my eyes. I love Jinhua, and I am pride② that Im from Jinhua.
江苏省赣榆县罗阳中学七(5)班 杨纪龙
1. 优点:
小作者从旅游景点、美食等方面介绍了自己的家乡——金华。小作者笔下的家乡既有古老的气息,又不失现代化的感觉,不仅有引人入胜的美景,还有令人垂涎欲滴的各种美食。文章结尾处,小作者还表达了对家乡的热爱和内心的自豪感,升华了文章主题。
2. 需要修改的地方:
① across改为through。across表示“从事物表面通过”,而through表示“从事物内部通过”;
② pride改为proud。pride是名词,意为“骄傲,自豪”,而proud是形容词,意为“骄傲的,自豪的”。
3. 评分:
按江苏省连云港市中考英语作文满分20分的评分标准,本文修改前可得18分。