幽默小故事

The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

“George， how did you like your new teacher？” asked his mother.

“I didnt like her， mom， because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six， too.”

新老师

9月1日，乔治放学回到家里。

“乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗？”妈妈问。

“妈妈，我不喜欢她，因为她说3加3得6，可后来又说2加4也得6。”

Improvement1

One student says to another， “How are your English lessons coming along？”

“Fine. I used to be one who couldnt understand the Englishmen， and now its the English men who cant understand me.”

进步

一位学生对另一位学生说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样？”

“很好，我过去听不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人听不懂我的话了。”

Are You Using Your Mower2 this Afternoon？

Mr. Johnson： Are you using your mower this afternoon？

Mr. Smith： Yes.

Mr. Johnson： Fine. Then can I borrow your tennis racket， since you wont use it？

今天下午您准备用割草机吗？

约翰逊先生：今天下午您准备用割草机吗？

史密斯先生：是的。

约翰逊先生：太好了。既然您不用网球拍，那我可以借用一下吗？

I Had to Change It Twice

Judge： I dont understand why you broke into the same store three times in a row？

Robber： Well， Your Honor， I picked out a dress for my wife， and I had to change it twice because she didnt like the style.

我不得不换两次

法官：我真不明白你为什么连续三天夜里闯入同一家商店呢？

盗贼：噢，阁下，我为我妻子挑选了一件衣服，因为她总是不喜欢衣服的样式，所以我才不得不换了两次。

How Do You Know？

Diner： Hey， waiter. This soup tastes like dish water！

Waiter： How do you know？

你是怎么知道的？

就餐者：嗨，服务员！这汤尝起来像刷盘子水！

服务员：你是怎么知道的？

The Spider Will Eat It

Diner： Waiter， theres a fly in my soup.

Waiter： Dont worry， sir. The spider on the bread will eat it.

蜘蛛会把它吃掉

就餐者：服务员，我的汤里有一只苍蝇。

服务员：不要担心，先生，面包上的蜘蛛会把它吃掉的。

She Is Not Good at Playing the Piano

Piano tuner： Ive come to tune3 your piano.

Lady： But we didnt send for you.

Piano tuner： No， but your neighbours did.

她不擅长弹钢琴

钢琴调音师：我来给你的钢琴调音。

女士：可是我们并没有派人去请你呀。

钢琴调音师：是的，不过是你的邻居请我来的。

Answering the Iron4

A guy goes to work， and both of his ears are all bandaged5 up.

The boss says， “What happened to your ears？”

He says， “Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and （holds iron to ear）， shhh！ I accidentally answered the iron.”

The boss says， “Well， that explains one ear， but what happened to your other ear？”

He says， “Well， I had to call the doctor！”

冲着熨斗回话

一个小伙子去上班，两个耳朵上都缠着绷带。

老板说：“你的两个耳朵怎么啦？”

他说：“昨天，我熨衬衣的时侯，电话铃响了﹙做出把熨斗举到耳边的姿态﹚，咝！我不小心拿熨斗接电话了。”

老板说：“好，这只耳朵解释完了，但是另外一只耳朵怎么啦？”

他说：“是这样，我不得不打电话给大夫！”endprint