Last summer, I went to Qingdao with my parents. We took a high-speed rail and after an hour we got to Qingdao. It was a beautiful city. The sky was blue and the air was clean.
On the second day after we got to Qingdao, we went to one of the most famous beach①. I was so careless that I lost our camera on the bus. We were very worried, so we got back② the bus station to look for it. To our surprise, we found a young man stand③ beside the bus, with our camera in his hand. We were so thankful.
My trip to Qingdao seemed short and tiring, but my memory of the trip is lasting and pleasant.
江苏省赣榆县罗阳中学八(1)班 刘权基
1. 优点:
文章条理清楚,思路清晰。首先,介绍旅游的时间、目的地、交通工具等信息;然后,描述旅游过程中的具体活动及所见所闻等;最后,表达旅游后的感受。全文通顺流畅,是一篇值得推荐的学生习作。
2. 需要修改的地方:
①beach改为beaches。one of后接可数名词的复数形式;
②get back改为get back to。“get back to+具体地点”意为“返回某地”;
③stand改为standing。find sb. / sth. doing sth.,意为“发现某人或某物正在做某事”。
3. 评分:
按江苏省连云港市中考英语作文满分20分的评分标准,本文修改前可得17分。