An Unforgettable Activity

本期點评名师

陈传光男，江苏省连云港市罗阳中学高级教师、连云港市优秀教育园丁、江苏省教育学会会员，从事教育教学工作多年;曾获英语教研能力大赛区一等奖、英语专业技能大赛市一等奖、班主任基本功大赛市一等奖;有多篇论文在各核心和主流期刊上发表;曾指导学生在各类竞赛中取得不错的成绩，有多人获得地市级奖和省级奖。

An Unforgettable Activity

Our Chinese teacher Mr. Wang wanted us to relax ourselves after busy study，so we held an activity on the playground last Friday afternoon. He told us，“Showwhat you can do.”

We were excited and looked at others happily after his words. To me surprise， Alice sang an English song about the countrys life. She sang so goodthat we were moved deeply. Frank was a quiet boy， but this time he did kung fuas if he has learned it for years. After that， Tim told us the story of. We all laughed when he acted as Sun Wukong. I performed Beijingopera successfully. We all enjoyed ourselves. At last， our teacher said，“Youregreat. We need to play hard and study hard in our life！ ”

This activity was interesting and meaningful. I will never forget it.

江苏省连云港市罗阳中学夏悦

1. 优点：

本文是一篇介绍文娱活动的作文。小作者开篇直接交代了这次文娱活动的时间、地点和内容，接下来具体介绍了活动的情况。整篇文章语句通顺、思路清晰，是一篇不错的学生习作。

2. 需要修改的地方院

①me 改为 my。to ones surprise 是固定短语，意为“令某人吃惊的是”。

②good 改为 well。修饰动词 sang 要使用副词 well。

③has learned 改为 had learned。这个句子表示“过去的过去”发生的事情，应该用过去完成时，has 应改为 had。

3. 评分