小幽默

杨扬

A Dollar Per Point

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.

Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying “A dollar per point.”

The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $64 change.

一分一塊钱

教授正在给学生们监考。他发下试卷，然后回到讲台前等待。

考试结束了，学生们纷纷交回试卷。教授发现一张试卷上别着一张百元钞票，还有一张纸条写着：“一分一块钱。”

第二堂课，教授把试卷都发回学生们手中。其中一个学生不但得到了试卷还得到64块钱的找零。

Haircut

Miles sometime went to the barbers during working hours to have his hair cut. But this was against the office rules： clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time. While Miles was at the barbers one day， the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut and sat just beside him.

“Hello， Miles，” the manager said. “I see that you are having your hair cut in office time.”

“Yes， sir， I am，” admitted Miles calmly. “You see， sir， it grows in office time.”

“Not all of it，” said the manager at once. “Some of it grows in your own time.”

“Yes， sir， thats quite true.” answered Miles politely， “But Im not having it all cut off.”

理发

麦尔斯有时在上班时间去理发店理发，但这是违反办公室规定的：职员只能利用自己的时间理发。一天，正当麦尔斯理发时，经理碰巧也进来理发，而且就坐在他旁边。

“你好，麦尔斯，”经理说：“我看到你在上班时间理发了。”

“是的，先生。正是这样。”麦尔斯平静地承认了。“可先生，你看，头发是在上班时间长的。”

“不全都是吧，”经理立刻说：“有一些是在你自己的时间里长的。”

“对呀，先生，你说得很对。”麦尔斯礼貌地回答说：“但我并没有把头发全都剪掉啊。”

Boy， Oh Boy

When theyre together， my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. One Saturday， I put my foot down. “All right， you two，” I said sternly. “No screaming， grabbing， whining， hitting， teasing， tattling， breaking toys， scratching or fighting.”

As I turned to leave， I heard my son say， “Cmon， Steven， lets get dirty.”

让人无奈的孩子

我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。一个星期六，我开始抗议了。“好啦，你们两个，”我严厉地说：“不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许闲谈，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。”

我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。”

（浙江杭州〓杨〓扬〓供稿）