In My Next Life

绘◎KUNATATA

In my next life I want to live backwards.

You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in an old people's home①old people’s home 养老院

feeling better every day.

You get kicked out②get kicked out开除；被赶出去for being too healthy,

go collect your pension, and then when you start work

you get a gold watch and a party on your fi rst day.

You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.

You part, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous③promiscuous 英 [prə'mɪskjʊəs] 美 [prə'mɪskjuəs]adj. 混杂的；杂乱的 adv. 偶然地；胡乱地,

then you are ready for high school.

You then go to primary school,

You become a kid, you play,

You have no responsibilities,

You become a baby until you are born.

And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious④luxurious 英 [lʌg'ʒʊərɪəs; lʌg'zjʊə-; lʌk'sjʊə-]美 [lʌɡ'ʒʊrɪəs] adj. 奢侈的；丰富的；放纵的；特级的spa

like conditions with central heating and room service on tap

larger quarters every day and then, Voila⑤voila 英 [vwʌ'lɑː] 美 [vwɑ'lɑ] int. （法）瞧；可不是！

You finish off as an orgasm！