听奶奶的话

“Granny， what does it feel like to be almost 80 years old？”

The question came up at the dinner table， in between mouthfuls of crab leg drenched in melted butter. I dont know what it was about that particular night， but for some reason in that moment I just had to know.

Ill never forget the look on my grandmothers face. It was an expression thats nearly impossible for me to put into words. It literally felt like I was watching her life flash before her eyes. After a very long pause， Granny took a breath and answered.

“It feels…impossible. If that makes sense.”

Over the course of a few seconds， our laughter-infused seafood dinner conversation had gotten pretty deep. I wanted to know more， but I had to figure out how to go about it—and fast.

Minutes later， after the crab shells had been thrown away， Granny found herself in the backyard， sitting in a chair across from my sister， Cailin and me. I held a small voice recorder in my hand， and my sister had a notebook and pen waiting patiently in her lap. The sun was sinking beneath the horizon， though the near-summer air remained warm， as I delivered my first question.

“What has been the most memorable moment of your life so far？”

“I think the birth of my sons. Its the ultimate joy to see a new person come into the world that you helped create.”

That was an easy one. The next one would be a little more difficult.

“Do you have any regrets？”

Granny surprised me by answering， before I even finished the sentence， with an incredibly firm and quick “no.” She continued.

“I have no regrets in my life.”

Of course， I wanted to know her secret to living nearly eight decades and having no regrets.

“My secret is being true to yourself and…maybe living each day to its fullest. But I have no regrets. Theres not one thing I would do differently.”

Cailin was quickly taking notes on the bench next to me， recording every word Granny said. I asked her what advice she would give to her teenage self.

Dont worry about the small stuff. There are so many things， just this week， that Ive heard you girls talk about， you know， this person and that person， that in the great scheme of things dont really matter. I think thats what Id tell myself. I remember crying over silly things when I was your age and I think now， how silly I was. Getting all upset over those things. I would go back and tell myself not to worry about the small stuff.

Cailin asked Granny how you can tell the difference between the small stuff and the not-so-small-stuff.

My theory now is that if its not life threatening， its no big deal. Sometimes the things you think are big things really are not. You make a mountain out of a molehill. As you go through the process of living， youll learn the difference between the two. You will come across major crises in your life. Nobodys life is perfect. Life is about recognizing what is worth getting worked up over—and its not some silly boyfriend or something. When youre a teenager， things like that feel like such a crisis.

She went on to tell a story of a breakup she went through straight out of high school. I asked her if it felt like the end of the world at the time.

Oh heavens， yes！ And now we both laugh about it！ Thats another thing Id tell my teenage self—you gotta laugh every day. You have to laugh at something. Even if you have to laugh at yourself. I think thats what keeps you going， to have a sense of humor. You cant take life too seriously. Sometimes there are things that you just cant do anything about， and all you can do is laugh and make the best of it.

Cailin and I thanked Granny for the interview， and the three of us headed back inside. I was ready to take on the world with an all-new outlook on life， and though the sky now completely lacked light， my heart was full.

Thanks， Granny.

“奶奶，年近八旬是怎样一种感觉？”

这个问题是在我们晚饭的餐桌上蹦出来的，当时我嘴里还塞满了蘸着溶化黄油的蟹腿肉。我不知道那一晚自己是怎么回事，反正在那一刻，我就是想知道。

我永远不会忘记奶奶的表情——那是一个我几乎无法用言语来形容的表情。那感觉真的就像我看着奶奶的一生在她眼前闪过一样。一段长时间的停顿过后，奶奶吸了一口气，做出回答。

“那感觉就像……不可能发生的事情，如果这个答案还算合理的话。”

在几秒钟的时间里，我们原本充满笑声的海鲜大餐谈话变得深刻起来。我希望多知道一点，但我必须想想如何进行这件事——而且还要快。

几分钟后，蟹壳已经被清理干净。奶奶来到后院，坐在一张椅子上，面对着我姐姐凯琳和我。我手里拿着一个小型录音机，姐姐大腿上放著笔记本和笔，正耐心地等待着。尽管临近夏天的空气依旧温暖，太阳却渐渐沉入地平线。我提出了第一个问题。

“到现在为止，您的人生中最难忘的一刻是什么时候？”

“我想是儿子们出生的时候。看到自己有份创造的新生命来到这个世界，是我最大的快乐。”

这个问题不难，下一个会难一点。

“您有遗憾吗？”

奶奶在我还没说完这句话之前就异常坚定而迅速地回答说“没有”，让我颇为吃惊。她继续说道——

“我的人生没有遗憾。”

我当然想知道活了将近八十年却毫无遗憾的奶奶究竟有什么秘诀。

“我的秘诀就是忠于自己……也许还有过好每一天。但我没有遗憾，我不会改变任何一件事的做法。”

坐在我旁边长凳上的凯琳迅速地记着笔记，记录下奶奶说的每一个字。我问她有什么建议要给少年时代的自己。

不要为小事而烦恼。生活中有太多事情了。就像这个星期，我就听见你们这些女孩在谈论这个人、那个人，这些事情在大局当中真的不重要。我想，那就是我会对自己说的话。我记得当我和你们一般大的时候，会为一些很无聊的事情流泪，我现在觉得自己那时是多么傻，为了那些事情而不开心。我会回到过去，对自己说不要为小事而烦恼。

凯琳问奶奶如何区分哪些是小事，哪些不是。

我现在的理论是，如果它们不是威胁生命的事情，就不是什么大事。有时候，你觉得问题很大，其实不然。你只是小题大做罢了。当你经历了人生的过程，你就会懂得两者的区别。你将遇到人生中各种重大的危机，没有谁的人生是完美的。人生就是一个认清什么值得我们去担忧的过程——并不是为男朋友之类的无聊事情。当你还是青少年的时候，总以为这些是天大的事情。

接着，她说了自己在高中一毕业就经历的那次分手。我问她那时是不是觉得那是世界末日。

噢，天啊，当然是了！可现在，我们两个都笑自己很傻！那也是我要对年少时的自己说的另一件事——每一天都要笑！你必须嘲笑一些东西，就算嘲笑的对象是自己。我想，那是让你走下去的东西，要有幽默感。你不能把生活看得太严肃。有时候，一些事情你确实无能为力，你能做的就是一笑置之，尽力而为。

凯琳和我谢过奶奶接受我们的采访，然后我们三人走回屋子。我已经准备好以全新的角度迎接世界的挑战。虽然现在的天空一点光芒也没有，但我的内心很富足。

谢谢您，奶奶。

语法小提示

Make a mountain out of

a molehill是一个很形象的说法，molehill 就是由鼹鼠打洞扒出的泥土堆成的鼹鼠丘，通常用来指代一些无意义的事，小困难或障碍。硬是把鼹鼠丘说成是一座山，不就是小题大做，言过其实吗？

形容词词组worked up（about） 在此处很容易被误以为是“努力”的意思。其实，它的正确意思应该是“激动的，焦躁不安的”，尤其指因忧虑引起的负面情绪。例如：He gets very worked up about going to school and leaves the house crying every day.（他对上学感到很紧张，每天都哭着离家。）work （sb.） up作动词词组时的其中一个意思是“使激动，唤起”，例如：Hed worked himself up into a terrible state about the coming exam.（面对即将举行的考试，他把自己弄得紧张极了。）