幽默小故事

李婧

（一）

Wife： You see. According to the statistics on the paper， 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcohol.

Husband： Its OK. To my investigation （调查）， all the people ate meals.

妻子：你看这张报纸，据统计，死于肝癌的人百分之八十都喝过酒的。

丈夫：这没什么。据我调查，死于肝癌的人百分之百都吃过饭的。

（二）

Teacher： What great event happened in 1809？

Little Willy： Abraham Lincoln was born.

Teacher： Correct. And what great event happened in 1812？

Little Willy： Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.

老师：1809年发生了什么大事？

小威利：亚伯拉罕·林肯诞生了。

老师：回答正确。那1812年又发生了什么大事呢？

小威利：亚伯拉罕·林肯过了三岁生

日。

（三）

Son： Dad， is French difficult to learn？

Father： My boy， at the beginning it is， but after that it becomes easy.

Son： Thats great！Ill learn the latter half.

儿子：爸爸，法语难学吗？

父亲：刚开始比较难，但是到后面就容易了。

儿子：太好了！那我就学后面的！

（四）

Two attorneys （律师） went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they took out sandwiches from their briefcases （公文包） and started to eat.

The waiter became quite concerned and marched over and told them， “You cant eat your own sandwiches here！”

The attorneys looked at each other， shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

两个律师走进一家小餐厅，点了两杯饮料。然后他们各自从公文包中拿出三明治吃了起来。

服务员看到后大步走过来对他们说：“你们不能在这里吃自己带的三明治！”

这两个律师对视了一下，耸了耸肩，然后互相交换了三明治。

（五）

One day， a father and his little son were going home. At this age， the boy was interesting in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now， he asked， “Whats the meaning of the word “drunk， Dad？

“Well， my son，” his father replied， “look， there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.”

“But， dad，” the boy said， “theres only one policeman！”

一天，以为父亲带着他的儿子一起回家，小孩在这个年龄，总是对什么事情都很感兴趣，喜欢问问题。小男孩问道：“爸爸，‘喝醉是什么意思啊？“

爸爸回答道：“儿子，你看，那里站着两个警察，如果我把他们看成四个警察，我就是喝醉了。”

小男孩说：“可是爸爸，那里明明只有一个警察呀！”