Ｔｈｅ Ｈｅａｌｔｈ ｏｆ Ｈｉｇｈ Ｓｃｈｏｏｌ Ｓｔｕｄｅｎｔｓ

调查显示，近几年我国中学生的健康状况不容乐观。请你就How to improve the health of high school students这一话题，写一篇英语短文,要求涵盖以下要点：

1. 中学生的健康状况: 存在近视眼、肥胖、体质弱等问题。

2. 造成此状况的原因及其危害。

3. 你认为应该采取的措施及理由。

注意：词数120左右，文章的开头已给出,不计入总词数。

How to Improve the Health of High School Students

Research shows that high school students health condition is declining obviously in recent years.

___________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________

【One Possible Version】

How to Improve the Health of High School Students

Research shows that high school students health condition is declining obviously in recent years. Most students are near-sighted, some are weak or overweight and many cant reach the physical standard. It is absolutely true.

What causes such problems? First, many students spend too much time before computers or TV sets. Second, because students have to prepare themselves for examinations in the society filled with severe competition, they spend most time on their subjects. Third, many of them dont form the habit of taking physical exercise regularly.

From the analysis above, its necessary and crucial to find ways to improve students health condition. One available way is to do physical exercise for at least an hour every day. In addition, a healthy diet also contributes to it. Above all, the schools should take measures to reduce the heavy burdens on the students.

【点评】

这篇范文有以下优点：

1. 分段成文，结构清晰。

写作技巧往往体现在结构合理、安排有序上。范文分为三个部分：

首段直击文中的核心问题：Most students are near-sighted, some are weak or overweight and many cant reach the physical standard.

中间段围绕主题：What causes such problems展开论述，分三点First ... Second ... Third ...来回答这个问题。

结尾发表自己的看法，并对全文进行总结和概括：Its necessary and crucial to find ways to improve students health condition.

2. 用词斟酌，升级替换。

短语和一些惯用法是英语的精华，使用得当，会使文章增色。在写作中，要培养一种主动唤醒和使用脑中高级词汇的意识。范文中 in addition, absolutely, severe, crucial, available等短语和高级词汇使文章读起来地道而有说服力。在写作文时，同学们可以特地思考脑海中最先闪现的词汇可否进行升级替换。例如，想要表达“结果”时，你想到词汇so，此时请暂停，想想是不是能够升级成as a result 或者as a consequence；当你表达“经常”时，会马上写下often，可regularly是不是更好些呢？