幽默四则

姜经志

Regret

Little George was crying one day, and his dad asked him why.

“Ive lost five pence,” sobbed George.

“Never mind,” said his dad kindly. “Heres another five pence for you.” But George cried louder than ever.

“Now what is it?” asked his dad.

“I wish Id said I lost ten pence.”

后悔

一天乔治哭了，他爸爸问他怎么了。

“我丢了五便士，”乔治哭着说。

“没关系，”爸爸和蔼地说。“我再给你五便士。”但乔治哭得比以前更响了。

“这是怎么了？”爸爸问。

“我后悔刚才没说丢了十便士。”

Nobodys Perfect

Teacher: Harris, youre no good at all—you cant add, subtract,

multiply or divide. Youre unable to figure out the simplest

of problems, and you got a zero in every test but one.

Harris: But, sir—nobodys perfect!

没有十全十美的人

老师：哈里斯，你算是没治了，你不会算加减法，你也不会算乘除法，你算不出最简单的问题，你除了有一次考试外，其它的都得了零分。

哈里斯：可是，先生——世界上没有十全十美的人。

I Cant See Clearly

Jack failed in his final examination. So his father blamed him for his poor result.

“You should find the cause of your failure,” his father said in anger.

“Yes, you should have gotten me a pair of glasses,” Jack said.

“You mean that you cant see clearly when the teacher writes in class?” his father asked.

“No, not that, I couldnt see clearly what my deskmate was writing in his exam paper.”

我看不清

杰克期末考试没及格，因此他爸爸责备他成绩差。

“你应该找出失败的原因，”他爸爸生气地说。

“是的，您应该给我买一副眼镜，”杰克说。

“你是说你上课时看不清老师写的字？” 他爸爸问道。

“不，不是这么回事，我看不清同桌卷子上写的是什么。”

A New Employee

Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel directors office.

“What is the meaning of this?” the director asked, “when you applied for the job, you told us you had five years experience. Now we discover this is the first job you ever held.”

“Well,” the young man said, “in your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination.”

新员工

一个年轻人在被雇用几个星期后，被叫进人事经理的办公室。

“这是怎么回事？”经理问，“当你申请这份工作时，你说你有5年的工作经验，现在我们发现这其实是你的第一份工作。”

“嗯，”年轻人回答，“你们的广告上说需要找一个有想像力的人嘛。”